The last few weeks haven’t been easy. After a rough 2022 I came into 2023 thinking “this will be my year! This will be the year I will get healthy, figure out my long term goals, and be happy”. And the year started out fairly well – a surgery I have been waiting for over 2 years for is finally on the books. My concerns about rising interest rates, inflation and the cost of living subsided somewhat as I renewed my mortgage. And while work was busy, it was the kind of busy that I love.
But then reality set in. I went for the blood work and ECG required before my surgery could be confirmed, and one of the tests came back with an anomaly. I’m not sure how much of an anomaly it is – I won’t be able to talk to my Doctor about it until next week, but it has me concerned. And because I can’t help myself, I have been googling and now my brain is fixated on the worst case scenario. I’m also worrying that the anomaly will mean that my surgery won’t be able to go forward as planned. The surgery is a knee replacement. The pain in my knee has been getting progressively worse for the past 2 years and is now at the point that I have trouble walking, let alone running. If I can’t have the surgery what then? How will I stay healthy? Exercise? Do the things that I love? My brain has been all over the place thinking about this.
You might be wondering why I am talking about this on a running page. The answer is that when life is giving you lemons it can be difficult to motivate yourself to run. This is true for me. When I get stressed I want to hide at home. Lose myself in a book or a movie, have a bath, and generally remove myself from the world. But this time I am stopping myself from having this reaction. Regardless of what happens with my health, my mortgage or anything else the world throws at me, I can still go out, run to the best of my ability and be as happy as I can. And that is what I am going to aim to do. I hope that the next time you are feeling lost in stress, or feelings, you will think of this and push yourself to step out of your comfort zone. Go for a walk or a run, do something that makes you happy. And thrive.
